Last night at around 6ish, I was on the computer working and there was a knock at the door. I opened the door to find a man who looked pretty ragged, he was on a bicycle and was holding a note. The only thing I could think of was"Where's my son?". I knew that he was outside with Jeff, but I wanted my eyes on him right now and wanted him to stay far away from the house. For a split second, I was scared to death. Not so much for my life, but just wanted to make sure that D was safe.
The guy clearly could not speak or hear. The note said "Will you give me food?". I said hang on a second and didn't know what to do. Millions of questions were running through my mind - Does he live local and need canned food? Was he looking for dinner, for snacks? Was he going to hurt us? I mean, if I were to see a mugshot of him on TV I would have thought how on earth could no one have known he was dangerous? I gave him a can of Chow Mein (I know, I was freaking out and nervous;) and a couple of packages of cheese and crackers. I wanted to help, but didn't know what to give him. I knew though that I wanted him away from the house before D got wind of what was going on.
I yelled over to Jeff and asked if D was there with him. He was working on his trailer and looked up with a concerned face (not concerned enough to come over and see if I was okay though ;) and said Yes. D now sees that we have "company" and starts running over. Jeff yelled at him to stay over there with him. Now it probably sounds like I'm over reacting, but this stuff doesn't happen in this tiny town. I've seen homeless people on the street but this was MY HOME, my safe place.
He got himself situated, picked up his bike and pushed it to the front of my house behind my car. He opened the cheese and crackers and ate them pretty quickly and then headed down the driveway. When I got the big picture (the fact that he seemed hungry and that he had a sleeping bag and all of his belongings on this bike) I felt terrible. My heart just sunk. I walked out to tell Jeff what was going on and his first question was "Well, did you give him our leftover dinner?". I hadn't even thought of that because I wasn't exactly sure what he wanted without having taken a good look at his bike.
If you've held in here this long, this is where the story get's good ;).
So what do I do????? I put our leftover dinner in a container and head off to find him. I drove up and down through town and couldn't understand how quickly he could have disappeared - he was gone! I thought hmmm, maybe he wasn't real, maybe this was all a test =). So finally I pray, God if this man truly needs this food please let me find him. So on my way back through town (the same place that I'd passed 2 or 3 times already) there he was. I pulled over and tried talking to him, but he didn't understand me and asked me to write it down. I told him that "I was sorry that I hadn't given him more to eat. That he just startled me because I didn't know him, but I wanted to make sure that he had some dinner". and then I handed him the food.
So here's the funny party. He took it and nodded and kind of shrugged and looked at me like "I" was crazy!! So there, now a crazy homeless guy is scared of ME! I just had to giggle as I drove away.
In all seriousness, after reading last night about the school shooting in PA yesterday, I got a little uneasy. I mean people who are seemingly normal go off the deep end all of the time. What if this guy really is crazy and comes into my home in the middle of the night? I know it's just my my mind running wild, but you just never know these days. Funny how you can pass a homeless person on the street and even give them money and you don't think much of it. Then when they're on your doorstep and in YOUR space, it's a whole different ballgame. I've often wondered if my willing to give will eventually be my demise. If I have to go because I've given to someone in need, then I guess there are worse ways to go. My prayer is that it wouldn't harm Jeff or D in the process. All you can do is pray that you're doing the right thing and go on with it!
So there's my Lucille ball story of the day =).
Now, as adults. Can't we do that if we really want to? Changing our lives. Trying something new. May seem a little awkward at first, but if we keep at it, soon we will be seeing the world from a different perspective. We may have butterflies in our stomach, but if we really put our minds to it, we can soon be grinning from ear to ear. 
